When we stop to consider Does Love Make Us Happy; the answer to this is two-fold. Yes love can make us happy but it can also make us sad. Love in itself cannot bring us happiness unless we love ourselves and know that we must be the author of our own happiness. It is not the love of another individual that cures all.
Being in love or having someone to love us is a wonderful thing but if we depend upon this person's love to cure all of our ills; we will at some point have a great awakening. People fail us, they fall out of love sometimes and go in different directions. You might say; well it wasn't love then and you could be right but that is why first we must make sure we "love ourselves" enough to keep our life on track without the love of anyone else. Loving ourselves means that we like who we are. We may need some improvement but we are doing the best we can and we do not need another person to make us whole. We know that being dependent upon any other soul for everything just might take our life away; so we plant our own garden and do not wait for someone to bring us flower. We endure and we preserve our faith within our own heart.
We learn in the scriptures that the two become one when marriage vows are spoken. Even in marriage love can fade or people can be caught up in situations which makes them think another path is what they need. It is never easy in a marriage to let go of someone whom we have loved for a long period of time and we "thought" they had the same love. When these kinds of things happen; we must then still "love ourselves" enough to keep our chin up; keep on walking, tall and straight, knowing that live is still worth living and we have the right to be happy. This is when we learn that "love within itself" does not totally make us happy. We can survive without a companion to love us. We can survive without a friend walking by our side and we can survive if the it seems the whole world doesn't know we exist. We can, we can, we can!
This kind of thought will bring us out of the gloom of not having someone dear to love us. We must keep loving ourselves and life. It can always be worse...most of us can vouch for that. No matter how many times we lose at love; there is still hope to find it again but we learn with each goodbye that we really do have self worth and that we must keep on loving ourselves.
"You must love yourself before you love another. By accepting yourself and fully being what you are, your simple presence can make others happy." Author unknown
"Love doesn't make the world go round; love is what makes the ride worthwhile." -- Franklin P. Jones
"You can give without love, but you can love without giving." -- Love quotes
"If we depend upon another human to sustain us; we might get disappointed when they can't. If we depend upon ourselves; we know we can live through anything." --me
Tuesday, September 28, 2010
Actions of Love
What are Actions of Love? Most of us have experienced Actions of Love as a child or tough love from our parents. When we were kids many times our parents gave of Actions of Love to help us grow into adults with the needed wisdom to sustain life. They taught us that if we disobey; we must accept the consequences of our actions and not try to blame our sibling. They taught us that being is good will in the long term give us good things and being bad or disobedient, will bring us what we don't want. Punishment of some kind, discipline we wish we did not have to experience.
We had to be taught how to live, love and care about others. We were disciplined when we were greedy, misbehaved or just plain naughty. We were taught to respect, honor and obey. We had to learn that life does not give us anything but we all have opportunity to work, learn and grow. We learned early on that we must work hard for what we have and that life is filled with the unknown and there is not anyone who doesn't experience difficult times. We had to learn that we can't have everything we want or desire and that we must make the best of what we have. What went wrong with some of us?
Actions of love; sometimes called tough love, is part of growing into adulthood with the right ideas about how to life a successful life and if we have not; we have missed out on the most essential part of life lessons. If we have not been taught the basics of life or have not heeded to those principles; our life will more than likely be very difficult. Why? Because the basics are that we must have compassion for others, be willing to share life's blessing, and promote others instead of being jealous. We must have learned that no one has it all. Not even the most wealthy. You might note that the rich seem to miss knowing what real happiness is. They get caught up in their ability to have what they want, go where they please and are never satisfied with anything for long. That is not truly living...not really.
We would never be worth anything great without learning that we must sometimes feel deprived, we learn that everything we want just might not be what we need. We should have learned that a man/women's character is worth more than the money that is in the bank. We should have learned that integrity is by far the ultimate quality to obtain respect and admiration in the work place.
All Actions of Love, tough love are when our parents told us no when it made us so mad we could bite a nail into. Actions of Love in adulthood are when life itself says no; that is not what you need. All of our plans are going to work out like we want...it is for our good most of the time. We want what we think we want without consideration of the consequences a lot of the time and then....we forget that we must accept responsibility for our actions always. We don't like it...but that is God's tough love.
We had to be taught how to live, love and care about others. We were disciplined when we were greedy, misbehaved or just plain naughty. We were taught to respect, honor and obey. We had to learn that life does not give us anything but we all have opportunity to work, learn and grow. We learned early on that we must work hard for what we have and that life is filled with the unknown and there is not anyone who doesn't experience difficult times. We had to learn that we can't have everything we want or desire and that we must make the best of what we have. What went wrong with some of us?
Actions of love; sometimes called tough love, is part of growing into adulthood with the right ideas about how to life a successful life and if we have not; we have missed out on the most essential part of life lessons. If we have not been taught the basics of life or have not heeded to those principles; our life will more than likely be very difficult. Why? Because the basics are that we must have compassion for others, be willing to share life's blessing, and promote others instead of being jealous. We must have learned that no one has it all. Not even the most wealthy. You might note that the rich seem to miss knowing what real happiness is. They get caught up in their ability to have what they want, go where they please and are never satisfied with anything for long. That is not truly living...not really.
We would never be worth anything great without learning that we must sometimes feel deprived, we learn that everything we want just might not be what we need. We should have learned that a man/women's character is worth more than the money that is in the bank. We should have learned that integrity is by far the ultimate quality to obtain respect and admiration in the work place.
All Actions of Love, tough love are when our parents told us no when it made us so mad we could bite a nail into. Actions of Love in adulthood are when life itself says no; that is not what you need. All of our plans are going to work out like we want...it is for our good most of the time. We want what we think we want without consideration of the consequences a lot of the time and then....we forget that we must accept responsibility for our actions always. We don't like it...but that is God's tough love.
Sunday, November 15, 2009
Understanding Love
Today, may not be the best day for me to write and I'll just bet you have had days like this also, when you did not understand anything much, let alone having the answers to Understanding Love. Quite frankly, I don't know that it is possible to ever understand love.
My thoughts go to a couple who were close to me. Beautiful couple, so in love, he American, she was a Brit. They met while he was in the Air Force and stationed in England. The love they shared was what I think most women, I will say; dream about. There was a bond, a closeness, something different; I don't know if I can even begin to try and explain this it or give you Understanding of this love. It was out of a story book. I was not around them that much and only saw her a time or two but they were family and I could tell she had something special. Something pure, something good. Their love was so special, I was told by her husband afterwards and he tried to explain how it was. I do not think he ever completed understood it himself. Yes, it was rare, especially now days. I think, in fact, I know, it was a love that very few people share, very few. Maybe it was because they did not have as long to share it, but nevertheless; it was something good, something real. Not just in front of the family. His Mom went to England and visited with the family, and she shared in the splendor of their unity. I think we take human love for granted..instead of cherishing the love we have and when something stands to destroy it, we do not fight like we should to make it alright. If Bobby, I will call him..no not his real name, but if Bobby could have brought back that love in his life, he would have...but he couldn't...he did not have a choice. In a few moments time, it was gone, forever. Rose, I will call her, because she was a rose while she lived...but Rose, became ill and died suddenly in a matter of a few hours at the young age of 31. She was sick, no accident, she was sick and her illness was overlooked by the medical facility and her 2 children were left without a Mother and Bobby without the love of his life. I don't know if it could have been prevented or not, but there could have been more effort.
The moral of this "true tragedy" is that we are not promised of tomorrow. We say we love our partner, wife, husband, friend, and family. Do we really? I am not so sure anymore, if anybody loves anybody. I see people who use this word like it is candy, it sounds sweet. When you say you love someone, it should be the truth, not something you say because it sounds good or your Mama likes the person or you don't want to hurt someone's feeling. Do you know what I mean? You hurt someone worse by lying to them...they will get over it at some point. They deserve to meet someone (if they exist) that can love them unconditionally.
We take so much about love for granted. We do not watch how we speak to our spouse, how we treat them in public and private...respect does not seem to have the place it used to have when Mama and Daddy were living.....the old days. The Good Old Days! We should act the same way in private as we do in public; but we don't. We should let others know without even saying a word that we love who we are with, with a special kind of love. We should make our spouse feel good about themselves all the time not just when we need them for something.
Love is so important and if you have it, take care of it and do not throw it away at the drop of a hat. You may never have it again. Bobby has not, he raised his children by himself, did a great job; but no other love like Rose.
There may not be a lot that gives you any answer written in this post, and it is not that long; but if you have read about Bobby and Rose, you have an idea of what good love is, how it should be taken care of and realize that sometimes we do not get second chances when it come to Understanding Love.
I believe that we have to seek personal growth to change things that are not good. personal-growth-personal-develovpment
My thoughts go to a couple who were close to me. Beautiful couple, so in love, he American, she was a Brit. They met while he was in the Air Force and stationed in England. The love they shared was what I think most women, I will say; dream about. There was a bond, a closeness, something different; I don't know if I can even begin to try and explain this it or give you Understanding of this love. It was out of a story book. I was not around them that much and only saw her a time or two but they were family and I could tell she had something special. Something pure, something good. Their love was so special, I was told by her husband afterwards and he tried to explain how it was. I do not think he ever completed understood it himself. Yes, it was rare, especially now days. I think, in fact, I know, it was a love that very few people share, very few. Maybe it was because they did not have as long to share it, but nevertheless; it was something good, something real. Not just in front of the family. His Mom went to England and visited with the family, and she shared in the splendor of their unity. I think we take human love for granted..instead of cherishing the love we have and when something stands to destroy it, we do not fight like we should to make it alright. If Bobby, I will call him..no not his real name, but if Bobby could have brought back that love in his life, he would have...but he couldn't...he did not have a choice. In a few moments time, it was gone, forever. Rose, I will call her, because she was a rose while she lived...but Rose, became ill and died suddenly in a matter of a few hours at the young age of 31. She was sick, no accident, she was sick and her illness was overlooked by the medical facility and her 2 children were left without a Mother and Bobby without the love of his life. I don't know if it could have been prevented or not, but there could have been more effort.
The moral of this "true tragedy" is that we are not promised of tomorrow. We say we love our partner, wife, husband, friend, and family. Do we really? I am not so sure anymore, if anybody loves anybody. I see people who use this word like it is candy, it sounds sweet. When you say you love someone, it should be the truth, not something you say because it sounds good or your Mama likes the person or you don't want to hurt someone's feeling. Do you know what I mean? You hurt someone worse by lying to them...they will get over it at some point. They deserve to meet someone (if they exist) that can love them unconditionally.
We take so much about love for granted. We do not watch how we speak to our spouse, how we treat them in public and private...respect does not seem to have the place it used to have when Mama and Daddy were living.....the old days. The Good Old Days! We should act the same way in private as we do in public; but we don't. We should let others know without even saying a word that we love who we are with, with a special kind of love. We should make our spouse feel good about themselves all the time not just when we need them for something.
Love is so important and if you have it, take care of it and do not throw it away at the drop of a hat. You may never have it again. Bobby has not, he raised his children by himself, did a great job; but no other love like Rose.
There may not be a lot that gives you any answer written in this post, and it is not that long; but if you have read about Bobby and Rose, you have an idea of what good love is, how it should be taken care of and realize that sometimes we do not get second chances when it come to Understanding Love.
I believe that we have to seek personal growth to change things that are not good. personal-growth-personal-develovpment
Friday, November 13, 2009
What Is Love
Love is many different things to different people and for that reason sometimes we ask; "What Is Love"? I know for sure what Love it is not and have known for a very long time. My thoughts go to scripture that states; love is Kind, love is patient, love is not puffed up, love endureth all things and the list goes on. If we lived a a perfect world, we would know completely and without reservations What Is Love.
I can't even think of what it would be like not to have love in my life. Of course not because I am Mom. Most of us do not have to question What is Love, because we think we know it better than anyone, especially if we have become a Mother. Once you become a Mom, you understand so much more the absolute, perfect love. No matter how a child acts, the love never goes away and the bond is there regardless of how much that child rejects that love. It does not mean that sometimes it is better to have tough love than to see a child destroyed or for that matter let them know you will not agree to wrong doing. It is hard to have "tough love" when you know it might put your child in danger and there may be some parents who are judged because they have not found the heart to put it into action, when maybe they should have. Those of us who have not had to deal with serious matters and implement this love act, should be so thankful at this holiday season for this as well as all things good. I know that it must be hard when a parent has to say, if you going to act like this, please don't come to my house. I know it must be one of the hardest things to have to visit a child in prison because they have gone in the wrong direction and did not heed their parents voice early on. I think of so many situations where "tough love" has been replaced with complacent love and the parent is wondering; What is Love?
My next thoughts go to families where love didn't last and one spouse is wondering in the dark of the night; What is Love, anyway? I know it is hard when a little child comes to Mommy and says; Mommy, can Daddy come for Thanksgiving? What is more heartbreaking than this, is the fact that in so many situations when parents split, it could have been avoided in the first place if someone had been able to forgive and forget. Not always, but so much of the time. There are excuses for parents leaving sometimes that has nothing to with What is Love. It is simply because, someone said; you look so good today, my you look so sexy....or someone brushed along side of you and the sparks began to fly.......THAT'S NOT LOVE, PERIOD. That is called "getting attention" and going to the wrong source to get it!!! Feel guilty, you are suppose to!!!! The grass is always greener "you think". Once in the middle of the garden....you look back and wonder what made you do something so stupid!! These are facts that occur everyday in our society. When little babies are involved...it is far from being the act of love and we do not even have to ask; "What is Love".
What is Love? Again, Love is: patient, kind, considerate, longsuffering, forgiving over and over, positive, pure, without deception, without false statements, without critizism, without disrespect...oh, my I could go on and on and on!!!! Love is all things good if we choose it to be. spitirual-growth-spirituality
I can't even think of what it would be like not to have love in my life. Of course not because I am Mom. Most of us do not have to question What is Love, because we think we know it better than anyone, especially if we have become a Mother. Once you become a Mom, you understand so much more the absolute, perfect love. No matter how a child acts, the love never goes away and the bond is there regardless of how much that child rejects that love. It does not mean that sometimes it is better to have tough love than to see a child destroyed or for that matter let them know you will not agree to wrong doing. It is hard to have "tough love" when you know it might put your child in danger and there may be some parents who are judged because they have not found the heart to put it into action, when maybe they should have. Those of us who have not had to deal with serious matters and implement this love act, should be so thankful at this holiday season for this as well as all things good. I know that it must be hard when a parent has to say, if you going to act like this, please don't come to my house. I know it must be one of the hardest things to have to visit a child in prison because they have gone in the wrong direction and did not heed their parents voice early on. I think of so many situations where "tough love" has been replaced with complacent love and the parent is wondering; What is Love?
My next thoughts go to families where love didn't last and one spouse is wondering in the dark of the night; What is Love, anyway? I know it is hard when a little child comes to Mommy and says; Mommy, can Daddy come for Thanksgiving? What is more heartbreaking than this, is the fact that in so many situations when parents split, it could have been avoided in the first place if someone had been able to forgive and forget. Not always, but so much of the time. There are excuses for parents leaving sometimes that has nothing to with What is Love. It is simply because, someone said; you look so good today, my you look so sexy....or someone brushed along side of you and the sparks began to fly.......THAT'S NOT LOVE, PERIOD. That is called "getting attention" and going to the wrong source to get it!!! Feel guilty, you are suppose to!!!! The grass is always greener "you think". Once in the middle of the garden....you look back and wonder what made you do something so stupid!! These are facts that occur everyday in our society. When little babies are involved...it is far from being the act of love and we do not even have to ask; "What is Love".
What is Love? Again, Love is: patient, kind, considerate, longsuffering, forgiving over and over, positive, pure, without deception, without false statements, without critizism, without disrespect...oh, my I could go on and on and on!!!! Love is all things good if we choose it to be. spitirual-growth-spirituality
Sunday, November 8, 2009
Does Love Matter
I can probably write all day about this post; Does Love Matter? Yes, I believe it does and I will explain myself fully. This subject could go on and on, about so many aspects of life involving love. I think we will have to break it down a bit and put this in categories and then expand.
I wonder if anyone is able to get through life without love. I really do not know of anyone, myself. As far as I can tell, we humans are pretty much the same, with the same desires, needs, hopes and dreams. We all need to love and be loved. Why do I ask “Does Love Matter”? Let me explain, if you will. The Nun, who never marries, loves the Church. The woman or man who decides that they will not marry, still love their Mom, Dad and siblings. Those who live alone for one reason or the other, loves their animals. As I have said, I really can’t think of anyone I know, who does not love someone or something and if there is any doubt, I hope to fix this question; Does Love Matter?
From the time we are born we are taught the emotion of love. Even while in the womb, we are crunched up in a closeness and when we are set free, most infants take very little time bonding with Mom. Now there are methods that people use to bond before birth. The love that we receive as children, I believe directs our adult life and the fact that Love Does Matter. In the olden days, parents were afraid to show too much love; meaning they held back (fathers did, because moms thought it a good idea) hugs and kisses as they did not want their children to get the wrong idea. A lot of this has changed and parents outwardly show more love because we all know that the more love a person feels, the more secure they become. Praise is second in command as it also adds to the feel of confidence and generates why we know really, without asking; Does Love Matter? There is a difference in parents who absolutely go over the brink and let their kids rule the roast, so to speak. Too much of anything, is too much!
Do I think there are levels of the human needing love from another human? Yes, we know that every person living has different levels of desire for love in their life. We may again want to ask “Does Love Matter” when we see someone who lives alone and you can’t see their love for anyone or anything but then why does it help when a small child appears out of the blue and you can see the tenderness and love flow from that person to the child. Folks, Love Does Matter. I have seen children grow up in a family without siblings; they, sometimes, are lonely people and have a strong desire for love. I have also seen the opposite exist, they cultivate a life of being alone for the most part and like being along. I have seen children who have been rejected by their peers, become loners and end living alone. There are many instances that differ but still in the end; does love matter? Yes, because I still do not know anyone who does not love someone or something.
There are individuals who live alone go to work everyday, spend 10 hours a day on the job, go home and spend another few hours working. Get up and repeat the same….these people love their job. Does love matter in this case? Yes, because they are giving out something to someone; their boss, their company and it is for praise and recognition…it is love of being good at what they do as they have nothing more important in their life. Is it healthy? That is a matter of opinion and is another subject.
I know someone who outwardly cannot admit they love anyone (except their Mom). He jokes, plays around and most of the time it is like pulling teeth to get those words out of him; I love you or I love her. It is jokes and more jokes…and he will ask, what has love got to do with it? Do I believe that he doesn’t love anyone? No, I believe he does and it just makes him feel vulnerable to say it. He gives the most beautiful cards to his wife and helps her around the house in ways a lot of men do not. People have different expressions of love and one has to recognize it. Does Love Matter? Always….and forever! There is some excellent reading here
personal-growth-your-strengths.
I hope we talk again soon and thank you for reading my blog.
I wonder if anyone is able to get through life without love. I really do not know of anyone, myself. As far as I can tell, we humans are pretty much the same, with the same desires, needs, hopes and dreams. We all need to love and be loved. Why do I ask “Does Love Matter”? Let me explain, if you will. The Nun, who never marries, loves the Church. The woman or man who decides that they will not marry, still love their Mom, Dad and siblings. Those who live alone for one reason or the other, loves their animals. As I have said, I really can’t think of anyone I know, who does not love someone or something and if there is any doubt, I hope to fix this question; Does Love Matter?
From the time we are born we are taught the emotion of love. Even while in the womb, we are crunched up in a closeness and when we are set free, most infants take very little time bonding with Mom. Now there are methods that people use to bond before birth. The love that we receive as children, I believe directs our adult life and the fact that Love Does Matter. In the olden days, parents were afraid to show too much love; meaning they held back (fathers did, because moms thought it a good idea) hugs and kisses as they did not want their children to get the wrong idea. A lot of this has changed and parents outwardly show more love because we all know that the more love a person feels, the more secure they become. Praise is second in command as it also adds to the feel of confidence and generates why we know really, without asking; Does Love Matter? There is a difference in parents who absolutely go over the brink and let their kids rule the roast, so to speak. Too much of anything, is too much!
Do I think there are levels of the human needing love from another human? Yes, we know that every person living has different levels of desire for love in their life. We may again want to ask “Does Love Matter” when we see someone who lives alone and you can’t see their love for anyone or anything but then why does it help when a small child appears out of the blue and you can see the tenderness and love flow from that person to the child. Folks, Love Does Matter. I have seen children grow up in a family without siblings; they, sometimes, are lonely people and have a strong desire for love. I have also seen the opposite exist, they cultivate a life of being alone for the most part and like being along. I have seen children who have been rejected by their peers, become loners and end living alone. There are many instances that differ but still in the end; does love matter? Yes, because I still do not know anyone who does not love someone or something.
There are individuals who live alone go to work everyday, spend 10 hours a day on the job, go home and spend another few hours working. Get up and repeat the same….these people love their job. Does love matter in this case? Yes, because they are giving out something to someone; their boss, their company and it is for praise and recognition…it is love of being good at what they do as they have nothing more important in their life. Is it healthy? That is a matter of opinion and is another subject.
I know someone who outwardly cannot admit they love anyone (except their Mom). He jokes, plays around and most of the time it is like pulling teeth to get those words out of him; I love you or I love her. It is jokes and more jokes…and he will ask, what has love got to do with it? Do I believe that he doesn’t love anyone? No, I believe he does and it just makes him feel vulnerable to say it. He gives the most beautiful cards to his wife and helps her around the house in ways a lot of men do not. People have different expressions of love and one has to recognize it. Does Love Matter? Always….and forever! There is some excellent reading here
personal-growth-your-strengths.
I hope we talk again soon and thank you for reading my blog.
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If you require any more information or have any questions about our privacy policy, please feel free to contact us by email libbylee1@live.com
At http://doeslovematter.blogspot.com/ the privacy of our visitors is of extreme importance to us. This privacy policy document outlines the types of personal information is received and collected by http://doeslovematter.blodspot.com/ and how it is used.
Log Files
Like many other Web sites, http://doeslovematter.blogspot.com/ makes use of log files. The information inside the log files includes internet protocol ( IP ) addresses, type of browser, Internet Service Provider ( ISP ), date/time stamp, referring/exit pages, and number of clicks to analyze trends, administer the site, track user’s movement around the site, and gather demographic information. IP addresses, and other such information are not linked to any information that is personally identifiable.
Cookies and Web Beacons
http://doeslovematter.blogspot.com/ does use cookies to store information about visitors preferences, record user-specific information on which pages the user access or visit, customize Web page content based on visitors browser type or other information that the visitor sends via their browser.
Double Click DART Cookie
.:: Google, as a third party vendor, uses cookies to serve ads on http://doeslovematter.blogspot.com/
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